Theodore Roethke — Being, not doing

I must confess that being is very difficult for me. For years I have been caught up in the culture of doing — setting goals and working to achieve those goals. I find it very difficult to sit and just be. I must at the very least doodle. If I go on vacation, it often takes me a week to relax and forget my day job. But I still feel I must be doing something. Write. Draw. Read. Produce something of value. Rarely can I just be.  I simply cannot sit and doing nothing.  My thoughts continue to flow.

How about you? Are you caught up in the culture of doing or have you learned like Roethke to enjoy just being?

Here is my favorite Theodore Roethke poem. I love the first three lines. This is a poem to be read out loud. Listen to the interaction of sounds.

The Waking

I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.
I feel my fate in what I cannot fear.
I learn by going where I have to go.

We think by feeling. What is there to know?
I hear my being dance from ear to ear.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.

Of those so close beside me, which are you?
God bless the Ground! I shall walk softly there,
And learn by going where I have to go.

Light takes the Tree; but who can tell us how?
The lowly worm climbs up a winding stair;
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.

Great Nature has another thing to do
To you and me, so take the lively air,
And, lovely, learn by going where to go.

This shaking keeps me steady. I should know.
What falls away is always. And is near.
I wake to sleep, and take my waking slow.

I learn by going where I have to go.

Dr. Benjamin Mays — Goals

Research shows that only about 2% of Americans write goals.  I was 35 years old when I first heard about the importance of goal-setting in achieving one's dreams. In college I had dreamed of being a writer but at 35 was far from my dream. I had only written about 200 poems in 15 years. I set a goal to write a poem a day for a year. That year I wrote over 400 poems.

If you want to achieve your dreams, you need to turn them into goals.  Goals are dreams with deadlines.  Some creative leaders don't want to set goals because they are afraid they will not reach them. But the truth is that people achieve more when they have goals then when they don't. You may not reach the goal you set but you will come closer than if you had no goal. And as many people learn, the joy is in working to achieve the goal, not in actually achieving it. And when goal-setters reach their goal, they quickly set a new goal. 

I once met a 101 year old man who was writing his first book using a laptop computer in a nursing home. I visited that nursing home a couple of years later and the man, then 103, was writing his second book. What goals have you set for yourself? Your work? Your life?

Dr. Benjamin Mays must have been a master goal-setter for all that he accomplished. Mays was the youngest of eight children born to tenant farmers and former slaves in South Carolina. He earned a B.A. from Bates College in Maine, a Masters and a Ph.d in religion from the University of Chicago. He received almost 30 honorary doctorates in his lifetime. He was an ordained Baptist minister and an educator. He became President of Morehouse College in 1940, a post he held for 27 years. Mays wrote nearly 2,000 articles and nine books includingThe Negro's Church, the first sociological study of African-American religion. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., who graduated from Morehouse in 1948, called Mays his "spiritual mentor" and "intellectual father." 

Childhood home of Benjamin Mays

Harley King

There are hundreds of reasons that we should believe in our talents.  As creative leaders, we should celebrate our unique visions of the worlds we inhabit.  We should be proud of our accomplishments and our victories.



Yet, many of us are plagued by self-doubt and a lack of confidence.  We feel we are not good enough.  Even when we are successful, we are afraid that others will discover that we are frauds.  We race through life hoping that the truth will not be revealed and that we can escape embarrassment and shame.



We fail to realize that we have many reasons to love ourselves.  We are so busy focusing on our mistakes and weaknesses that we don't ever discover the truth.  We see only our faults and failures.



Open your eyes and see beyond your mistakes.  Take a moment and give thanks for who you are and what you have been able to accomplish.  Count all the reasons you should love yourself.  Then accept the gift of talent that you have been given and appreciate your strengths.  Be confident.  Be strong.  Love yourself.

Sally Field

"It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes."

— Sally Field

American Actress

November 6, 1946 -

Commentary
Probably one of the most negative, destructive critics that creative leaders confront are themselves. We are often harsher on ourselves than we are on our family, peers and friends. We compare ourselves to those around us and believe we are not as good. We believe that others don't like us and are looking down their noses at us. We take a simple negative statement that often is uttered and forgotten to heart and walk around crushed for days and weeks.

Don't judge yourself through the eyes of others. Don't let their negative comments penetrate your heart and soul. Protect yourself from the onslaught of their poisonous arrows. No one can know you better than yourself. Their comments are only their perception of who they think you are. They only see only a part of you. They don't know you.

Creative Practice
This week make a list of 10 of your most positive traits and post them somewhere that you can read them. Read this list aloud to yourself when you wake in the morning and again before you go to bed at night. Carry a copy of the list with you and whenever someone puts you down, pull out your list and read it aloud to yourself.

Biography
Sally Field, the Academy Award winning actress, was born in Pasadena, California to Richard Field, an Army officer, and Margaret Field, an actress. Her parents divorced when she was four. She was a cheerleader in high school. In the 1960s she starred in two TV shows: Gidget and the The Flying Nun. Gidget lasted only 32 episodes (one season) from September, 1965 - April 1966. The Flying Nun lasted for 83 episodes and ran from September, 1967 - September, 1970.

Sally Field starred in the title role of the 1976 TV movie, Sybil, and won an Emmy Award. She co-starred with Burt Reynolds in Smokey and the Bandit in 1977. In 1979, she starred inNorma Rae and won the Academy Award for Best Actress. She won a second Best Actress award for the 1984 movie, Places in the Heart.

Video
Here are clips from 10 of Sally Field's movies.