Harley King — Gift of Memory

Without memory, we lose all sense of self. We lose the threads and tangles that tell our stories. We lose our history from where we came. We lose our connection to the past. Memory gives our lives meaning and explains who we are and from where we came.

Yet, memory is fragmented, distorted and unconnected. Distorted memories can create false selves and cause us unhappiness. We must reshape our memories into a cohesive story that allows us to enjoy the person whom we have become. We must dig through the ashes of forgetfulness and find the keys to who we are.

Cradle your memories in your arms.  Give them the love and attention that they need.  Memory restores us to the world in which we live.  Choose to cherish your memories.

And as creative leaders, you are fortunate to have the skills and talents necessary to craft memory into a powerful story that touches the hearts and souls of others. Through the retelling of memory life is restored.

Carol Emshwiller — Change the World

Sometimes as creative leaders, we hope we can change the world — to make it a better place for everyone. Unfortunately, our vision of what we want the world to be and what it actually is rarely match. And even the most powerful people can not change the world to fit their vision. We can have an impact on the lives of some people and can alter the small corner of the universe where we eat and sleep. Maybe as Emshwiller suggests, we need to lower our sights. If I touch one heart, changed one life, I have made a powerful difference.

If I want to influence the world that I inhabit, I must first change myself. As creative leaders, we must work on becoming who we need to become before we can change those around us. It is very difficult to change someone else. Husbands and wives understand this. Those who learn to accept their spouses for who they are will be happily married. Those who spend all their time trying to change the behavior of those they love, often end up bitter and angry.

Change is something that we enjoy when we are the ones who initiate it. If someone else tries to change us, we put our foot down and refuse. As creative leaders, our art, writing and music can touch people's lives and inspire them when they are ready to hear and see. We all plant seeds and yet, we may never hear if the seeds grow and bear fruit. So we must hope that we have inspired a few.



What do you want or need to change in yourself?  What steps are you taking to change your behavior?  What are you doing to transform yourself into a better writer or artist? How will you be different tomorrow than you are today?  It is never to late to change your habits, your hopes and your dreams. Start today.

Harley King - Heroes and Stories

Are you the hero of your story? Or are you the victim? We all have faced challenges in our lives and we have struggled to overcome difficulties. We have people who seek to hurt us and cause us harm. Have you found the strength to share your story of triumph and victory over the pain? Or are you still dwelling in a past of unhappiness? Maybe it is time to retell your story with you as the hero. Maybe it is time to celebrate your healing.



Our stories are not new.  Others have tread the same path and faced the same challenges.  The difference is in the details. The difference is in our memories. Share your memories and the details that make your story unique. Share what is special about your story.



The fact that I have been fired five times in my career is a part of my story. Yet, I have risen from the ashes of failure to find new paths. I have used my failures as opportunities to grow and change. I have overcome the pain of loss. I have become the hero, not the victim.  I have been employed by the same company for the last 28 years.



The fact that I was diagnosed with prostate cancer is a part of my story.  Yet, today, ten years later, I am cancer-free.



The fact that editors have rejected my poems is a part of my story.  Yet, I did not let the rejection stop me from writing.  I chose to keep writing and have now written over 5,000 poems.  And I still write and rewrite my story.  I celebrate my story. 



What stories are you telling? Are you the hero?  Or the victim? Is it time to rewrite your story?

This entry marks the 950th post to this inspirational blog filled with positive quotes and comments. I have written every week for six years, beginning with my first entry on August 7, 2010.  The first two years I posted a daily entry. During the last four years I have posted weekly. I am writing and rewriting my story.

First blog post: August 7, 2010

http://harleyinspiration.blogspot.com/2010/08/every-flower-is-soul-blossoming-in.html

Andre Gide - Truth

Great novelists understand that truth is neither black nor white.  The best characters are filled with shades of gray.  Black and white characters are boring and leave little to the imagination or the heart.  As readers, we connect most with the characters who are conflicted and whose behavior is neither purely evil nor purely good.   The best stories communicate the nuances of the human soul.  



When it comes to the interactions of human beings nothing is black and white. You can always find some gray. Every person has some good in him as well as some bad.  For me, very little truth is black and white. Most truth, if not all, has various shades of gray. No human being has a monopoly on truth. We all make mistakes. 


Yet, many people choose to see the world as black and white.  They quickly choose sides and set up barriers which give rise to conflict.  Sometimes writers and artists fall into the trap of seeing the world as black and white: "Only our style of art is good. Everything else is bad." For much of the 20th century artists moved away from realism and adopted cubism, abstract expressionism, surrealism and magical realism. Realism became a negative word. In writing, we have literary novels and the genre novels. Mysteries, science fiction, fantasy and romance novels are considered by literary snobs not to be as good as the literary novels.

I grew up in a church where congregations would split up over such simple things as whether men should wear clothes with buttons or the fish and hook. The fights between the groups of people occur because each group believes they have cornered the market on truth. They probably agree on 95% of the issues, but they allow the five percent to divide them. They don't see the gray because they are blinded by the black and white.

Who in your life are you separated from because you each think you own the truth? A story does not just have one or two sides. It has thousands of sides. Nothing is black and white. Everything is gray. Break down those black and white walls today and gather those you love in your arms.

Christina Baldwin — The Gift of Creativity

Sometimes as writers we become caught up in the business of publishing and experience the hurt and pain of rejection. We become frustrated and sometimes quit writing because we don't think we are good enough. The need to write, to express ourselves, is not about being published. The need to write and to create is the gift in itself. Celebrate and honor the gift you have been given. Write for the sake of writing.  Write for the sake of the gift.

The same can be said of painting and any of the other forms of creative expression. Painting is not about selling your art to the highest bidder or having your painting hang in a museum somewhere. The art of painting is a gift to be honored and treasured. Respect and appreciate the gift that you have been given.

Isak Dinesen

In the last 25 years, the publishing world has sought to give us more and more memoirs — people sharing their stories of sorrow and pain. They have taken Dinesen's quote to heart. And there is a lot of truth here. We all tell our personal story — if not to others, at least to ourselves.  By sharing our stories we can begin to heal the pain and suffering we have experienced.



When my wife and I wrote our book on pet loss, we gave voice to the pain that pet lovers feel when their pet dies. We allowed people to tell their stories.  We heard the tears of people who felt they had lost a soul mate.  Some said the pain was worse than the death of a parent or a divorce.  Some were still crying ten to twelve years after the pet had died.  Sharing their stories helped some to bring closure and healing to a painful time in their lives.

One of the best salves for healing the pain and sorrow that we feel is writing. The process of putting our feelings, thoughts, and experiences down on paper will give us the opportunity to work through our pain and sorrow.


Unfortunately, some of us don’t feel we can write. We feel that writing is something for professionals with creative talents but not for us. Yet writing is one of the most powerful techniques we have for clarifying our feelings and working through our emotions. By opening ourselves up and expressing our pain and grief on paper, we will release the emotions that are suffocating and depressing us. Giving vent to our anger and pain through writing will help set us free.

What is your story? What sorrows darken your face? Have you put it in words? In pictures? In music? Healing comes with the sharing of our stories.

I want to share with you a process, that if you follow it, will help you share your story and begin to heal your wounds and help you to recover from your sorrow.

Twelve Guidelines for Telling Your Story 

1. Write for fifteen minutes every day. Discipline yourself to write even on those days you don’t feel like writing. 


2. Write in longhand with a pen or pencil. Do not use a computer. 


3. Begin either with the phrase “I remember’' or “I feel.” Whenever you run out of things to say, begin again with the phrase “I remember” and keep writing. 


4. Write without stopping for the full fifteen minutes. Keep your hand moving at all times. 


5. Write without thinking. Give free rein to your emotions and feelings. 


6. Feel free to say whatever you want. Don’t worry about what others will think. 


7. Be as specific as possible in your writing. Put in descriptive detail. 


8. Don’t try to be creative or cute. 


9. Don’t worry about spelling or grammar or what your English teacher taught you. You are not writing for a grade. 


10. It is okay to cry while you are writing. Keep writing through the tears. Don’t stop. 


11. Keep writing as long as you need. If you wish, you can expand your writing time to thirty minutes or an hour.


12. Initially, do not share your writing with others. They may not understand your expression of your pain or may be hurt by what you write.

Danny Kaye

We are in charge of our lives.  We make choices every day that lead us where we want to be.  Life is like a canvas and we are the artists of our lives.  We paint the person we want to be.  Or we paint the person we think we should be.  Or we paint the person we think others want us to be.    



Are you painting the life you want?  Have you chosen a large enough canvas?  Are you too stingy with the paint?  What color are you painting on the canvas of your life?  Blue?  Red?  Purple?  Are you painting flowers?  Or dirt?  Is the life you are painting happy?  Or sad?  Or anxious?



We tell our stories through what we paint on the canvas.  Others will know us by what we paint.  They will judge us by the colors we use or fail to use.  What stories are you telling?  Have you changed the facts to fit the story?  Or have you altered the story to fit the facts?  Are the pictures of your life filled with people?  Or animals?  Or is your life a landscape empty of people and animals?  Do you prefer the solitude of the mountains or the splashing of waves against the shore?



Are  you timid in how you approach life?  Or do you rush full speed ahead and ignore the red flags popping up every where?  Do you splash the paint on the canvas or do you make tiny delicate strokes with your brush?



Can you visualize your future?  Do you know what you want to paint on the canvas of your life?  Do you know what color you want your life to be?  Are you only painting the surfaces of your life?  Or are you exploring the depths of your soul?  If we look into your eyes, what will we see?  



Every day we pick up the paint brush and add a few strokes of paint to our self-portrait.  Is your self-portrait a true picture of who you are?  Or do you need to change the paint brushes that you are using?  Or do you need to use different colors that better reflect your character and inner beauty?  Are you painting the picture you want to paint?